It Was Just A Note…Maybe

The corn fields of Illinois stretch from the outer suburbs of Chicago to its southern reaches.  I know -- I just drove past many of them, now filled with only post-harvest stubble.  Why a group of inner city folks from Chicago were taking that long ride is a story of good news.

Sixteen years ago during the Rock/Circle summer HarvestFest my wife, Lonni, was greeted by a young woman who surreptitiously slipped her a note.  It read, “My name is Sherry Allen.  I am 31 years old.  I have two girls, Vicki six and Ebonyck, four.  Sometimes I just need someone to talk to.  Can you call me sometime?”  That note, and the events that transpired over the ensuing sixteen years is why Lonni, Cy (our little guy) and I sat with the small Chicago group in a sea of thousands, celebrating the bestowing of degrees from Southern Illinois University.

Sociologists track the rate of single parenthood as a reliable future indicator of poverty.  In other words, get pregnant when you are young and poor and some day, after a life of struggle you will be old and poor, should you survive.  More than likely your children will repeat the cycle.  All those years ago, there was nothing remarkable about Sherry Allen’s situation.  She was like thousands of young women on the west side of Chicago.  The future outlook was, as anyone would assume, predictably bleak.

What was remarkable about Sherry was her ability to rally the fortitude to write and give that note to Lonni, whom she had never met.  At the time she lived on the block behind Circle a few doors down from the dilapidated “murder building”, named for its nefarious reputation.  Sherry was trapped in a survival mode – years of welfare dependency and working necessary angles to provide for herself and the girls.  She had never had a white friend in her life.  What gave her the courage to reach out to this white lady?

As the years passed we’ve reflected and often joked about that note.  Sherry did not have a clue who she had chosen.  Whatever motivated her to give Lonni that note (and to this day she can’t really say), the invitation meant only one thing to Lonni.  Like Peter and John said all those years ago, “Silver and gold have I none, but such as I have give I you.”  Whatever the request intended, Lonni accepted it as an invitation to discipleship that began an extended, consistent committed relationship to continually challenge and equip Sherry to give God first place in her life.

As you’d expect, it has not been an easy journey.  The early years were filled with issues and struggles, but slowly the light of Christ began to fill the longings in Sherry’s heart.  One by one, she said goodbye to destructive relationships and habits and even began to volunteer in a public school.  That led to a job as a teacher’s aide which she holds to this day.  Lonni remembers a call she received from Sherry about ten years ago, “Lonni, I’m going to the currency exchange to cash my paycheck.  This is MY paycheck -- I earned every dollar and I’m so proud of this!”  It was a breakthrough moment that began to build one upon another.

The years have been filled with countless family connections between the Allen’s and the Kehrein’s.  Our kids became friends – more like siblings – as the stuff of life was shared.  Many occasions were filled with the laughter of clashing cultures, like the “strange” foods of the Kehrein household and trips to a dark and scary favorite cabin in the Michigan woods.  Cross cultural friendships have a special kind of richness.  And then there are the family struggles -- they added a cousin to their nuclear family and we added a grandchild into ours. 

In a flash, it seems, the little girls are now young women – Vicki’s college degree (medical administration major) is the first ever in their entire family and Ebonyck is right behind as a junior at the University of Missouri (nursing).  I’ve never seen a happier and more proud mom!!  Rightfully so.  And just as Sherry sat beside Lonni during the sadness of Lonni’s sister’s funeral last July, now Lonni sat beside Sherry at this pinnacle of joy and happiness.

Circle Urban Ministries and Rock Church offer many programs that reach out to the community and draw folks in.  But bad cycles don’t get broken by events or programs.  They merely create a context for the transforming work of the gospel.  Sherry’s commitment to follow Christ was strengthened, reinforced and challenged by her friendship with Lonni and our family relationships.  Our families have shared the things of life and the journey continues.  And for the next generation, the negative cycle has been broken.  The mistakes of the young mother have not been repeated in the next generation; instead, the love of Jesus shines brightly through Vicki and Ebonyck who are deeply committed to a Christ-like lifestyle.

Christ’s love can cut through all that separates us and can break down barriers erected by society.  So, my advice to you is this:  Write the note!  Or, if more appropriate, accept the invitation!  Make the step outside your comfort zone.  Respond to opportunities that life presents.  Who knows what God will do?